Balancing energy and sensitivity
The ability to shed a tear in behalf of someone else is growing rare these days, but probably among the key characteristics of true greatness. The degree to which we maintain or increase our sensitivity is a deciding factor to real influence.
Every so often all of us encounter people who appear arrogant and somehow insensitive. Without exception we also find they have limited positive energy. Positive energy can only grow if we grow in our ability to feel for others. Please consider the illustration below. Influence comes with energy, but energy is irrevocably linked to the degree of sensitivity. If we're unable to sense the feelings of others, we'll never reach higher than the first level of energy. Unfortunately we find a lot of professionals able to excite others, but it very seldom goes beyond that point. Why? Because they are consumed with self.
If we want to reach other people we need to exert strength and attention beyond our own world of concern. In other words, we need to put ourselves in the shoes of others. The popular term for it is empathy, but empathy is limited by the word itself. In the diagram we can see how empathy ("others") is but half way. If we want to reach energation and really strong commitment in others we need to move beyond empathy and become one with the shared reality around us - "external perception". This is when we tune in to outside impressions that allows us to become emotionally involved and mutually affected.
What do we do if the other person has feelings and has gone through hardships beyond what we ourselves have experienced? Is it possible to understand and empathize, when this is the case? The answer is "YES". If we do what is required to reach higher energy levels, we'll also be able to understand pain we didn't suffer ourselves. It's true! and it makes life richer to live. However, most of us are unwilling to do so because it causes us to share the distress of others. It hurts.
So what does this have to do with selling? Everything! Most sales people make their sales on the first level (see diagram). They'll get commitments and sign contracts based on passionate behavior, but the sale doesn't mean anything to them more than getting their paycheck and bonus. Just take one minute - think through all the contracts you signed with clients. Which ones do you remember? Which of them leaves you with positive feelings? If there are any, it will be those where you engaged yourself on the personal side and received reciprocally - the same feelings were exchanged. You built a relationship. You reached stronger commitments and harnessed greater value.
When we consider the balance between energy and sensitivity a lot of questions are answered and the sale becomes easier and more enjoyable. We practice SBP = SPP ;-)
Comments
understand, to put energy in the right direction
Karl Robert Isaksen
Monday 11 February 2008 12:09:08 pm
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